Friday, January 29, 2016

The Pain of Loosing Someone

Everyone has lost a loved one sometime in their life. The pain never really goes away but does get easier as time goes on. Recently I just lost a very special person in my life. My grandma who I always called Nanna went to be with Jesus on January 17th. Its been almost two weeks since she passed away but the fact of the matter is how do I accept this? How do I go back to normal days? When I will I stop crying? I'm sure if you are like me you have asked these same questions.

I would like to write today about how God and Jesus plays a big part in my healing process. It is so easy to turn away from God, place blame on yourself when something like this happens. You may think, why did they have to die? Why didn't God answer my prayers? Where was He when I needed him? Trust me, everyone probably at one time or another have thought these questions I mentioned. I for one have thought it but thank God I know the truth.

When I think of all the negative thought and questions I realize it was satan trying to destroy me and push me deeper into being depressed. Then I remember that God never lets me go. Even though tough times come He will never leave me and I am not alone. 

The past two weeks have been especially hard for me. I am so thankful I have a great support team of friends and family. Without them and Jesus I would be a hot mess. Even though this hurts and I feel part of me died with her I know she is in Heaven happy with Jesus and in no more pain. One thing is because of Jesus I know I will see Nanna again someday.

I've been listening to the song Tell Your Heart to Beat Again by Danny Gokey lately. It really has a great message for times like this when you lose a loved one. I encourage you to go take a listen.  Part of the lyrics that really stuck out to me were "Let every heartbreak and every scar, be a picture that reminds you who has carried you this far. 'Cause love sees farther than you ever could. In this moment Heaven's working everything for your good." Then of course I love the chorus of the song as well. 


Another thing that has really helped me through all this pain, hurt, and sorrow are my friends. There's too many to name them all that have shown me support with kind words and comments on Facebook, Instagram, emails, texts, and phone calls. I would just like to name a few people.

Jordyn for one has been such a great supporter of mine by listening to me vent, cry, and feel like I'm going to give up. She has been there for me and continues to be there for me. Thanks so much I love you.

Amber, you have been a blessing more then you know. Thank you for taking the time when we were heading to the cemetery for the burial to call me after you got out of class and pray with me over the phone. That meant more to me then you will ever know. Thanks for listening to me and just proving that you care for me. I always tell people you keep me focused on what matters and that's Christ. I love you so much sis!

Summer, you are such a blessing to me. You care about me and have shown it. Your texts make me smile and you really have encouraged me. Thank you for all the prayers, hugs and for being my friend and sister. I love you and can't imagine being able to get through this without you. Love you sis!

To all my other friends and family: Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I appreciate and love each one of you.

Grace Mae

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